FNN Report: Sports Cliches

FNN sports reporter, Jock Strapper, has analyzed thousands of newspaper, TV and radio sports reports searching for the most overused cliches.  Here are his winners (losers?)

1) "We have to take it game at a time." What else can they do?  Take a week at a time?  A season?  A play?  An inning? This cliche implies that that the team will refuse to play tomorrow’s game before today’s game is played which is ridiculous until we develop time-travel.

2) "I have to stay inside myself." If anyone understands what this means please write a  comment because I have no idea what this means. It doesn't make any sense to me.  Can a player stay outside of himself?  How does he do that?

3) "We have to take what he other team gives us." Really? If the other team is good, this sounds like an expectation of losing because the good team won't give them anything worth taking.

4) "This is a victory/game/tournament/performance for the ages." What arrogance!  What hyperbole!  Two days later hardly anyone will remember who won the victory/game/tournament/performance of this "one for the ages."

Strapper is looking for more sports cliches to expand the list.  If you have one, please write a comment with the cliche.

FNN: NFL to add lawyers for booth reviews

Jock Strapper, our sports reporter, filed this exclusive report.  According to a NFL source who requested to remain anonymous, the booth review process will now be joined by teams of lawyers from both teams.  The lawyers' job will be to ensure that the referees interpret the rules correctly. "Today's rules are extremely complex because they are written by squads of lawyers.  It has become apparent that the field officials are not qualified to interpret all the nuances of the modern rules.  Hence the need for teams of review lawyers."

Rather than have the lawyers bill on time spent, which could add thirty minutes or more to each review process, the NFL and the lawyers have reached an agreement that pays each lawyer a thousand dollars for every review they participate in.

Under the recently passed Full Employment for Lawyers Act, the Federal Government will reimburse the clubs for their new legal costs.

The source went on to say, that under this plan, the lawyers won't add more than five or seven minutes to the review process. We plan to entertain the fans during these extend reviews, we plan to air more commercials. 

FNN will bring you more on the impact of this decision after we interviewed some fans who face even more boring breaks in the action.